I have been grappling again with the concepts of polygamy and gay marriage. I had put them into the same category as alternative relationships but a friend’s words have made me look deeper into the realities of polygamy.
It is time for all societies to redefine marriage as a whole. It is time stop thinking about marriage as ownership and justification of sex and start thinking about marriage as a partnership. I have been contemplating more on the subject of polygamy and how it relates to the balance of male/female energies. In the discussion of balance polygamy simply doesn’t work. In monogamous relationships, whether heterosexual or homosexual, there is a predominately female partner and a predominantly male partner. That male/female balance in the partnership is what makes it work. When the energies are not balanced the relationship is at war with itself. If there is one man and two women the energy is out of balance. The man in that relationship has to step up his masculine nature to balance the feminine energy. The more women in the relationship the more dominant and controlling the man becomes as testosterone is increased to balance the estrogen. So even in the healthiest of polygamist relationships the male will attempt to dominate because it is his biological nature. Women may argue that polygamy works because of the natural collaborative bond between women, but there will always be an alpha female and a dominant male. We live in a monogamous society where balance can only exist in a one-on-one relationship when both male and female energies cooperate in partnership for the good of the whole.
2 thoughts on “The Balance of Polygamy”
i really wish that you could see this differently. i’ve been reading some of your posts and they are well thought out, but colored with past abuse. i understand, really and truly, what it is like to be hurt and not loved as a child. But polygamy has helped me find love and respect and self worth within myself.
Perhaps our relationship is different, as we accept and acknowledge Dominance and submission within our relationship, while you are speaking from a purely equalitarian standpoint. But i firmly believe that, with the right people, polygamy is a very real and very right type of love. It’s surely not for everyone. But i hope you don’t condemn or look down on those who are in such a relationship just because of how you grew up.
I do not condemn polygamy as a whole when it is based in love and not justified by fear based beliefs. As you said you accept dominance and submission as a necessity in order to maintain balance. For me personally those are words that are not acceptable in a relationship, but that is in my own ideal. I do not condone others who choose otherwise. I support any relationship that is based in love, equal treatment, mutual respect and open communication.
Although I suffered much abuse; physically, sexually, emotionally and spiritually as a result of my upbringing it is my intent to discuss these topics without judgement. It is my intent to share with others the personal freedom that comes from releasing judgment and the joy that comes from living in inner truth rather than the beliefs others have placed on us.