The Polygamist's Daughter

Stories, Reflections and Conclusions of Life on the Inside


Leave a comment

The Chosen Path

“Perhaps our path is not the one we are given. Perhaps our path is the one that we choose.” Mega Mind

pathMany of the kid’s movies emerging the past few years are teaching our youth that they are the creators of their reality and that they choose the direction their lives take. It is so refreshing to see that we are empowering children to make conscious choices rather than assuming someone or something else has it all planned out for them.

I remember as a child feeling like I was a pawn in God’s cruel game and that I had no choice how my life unfolded because it was all already planned for me. When people hurt me it was God’s will and part of His plan for me. The God I was taught to believe in was like the abusive parent who hurts His children and then expects to be loved even in the abuse. In my eyes, God was like my own father who would say, “I’m hurting you for your own good.”

Forced obedience to a relentlessly punishing father isn’t the same as unconditional love.  It is fear disguised as love.

Now I can see that free-will-choice is our ultimate freedom and as such we are the creators, co-creators and inter-creators of our lives. Every choice we make affects every other being on the planet and in that way we are all one. As much as we try to separate ourselves from ourselves as creators, and separate ourselves from each other, we cannot. Even when we give blame or credit to someone or something else, even God, we are all still creating. We are all choosing the direction our lives take, individually as well as collectively.

We are the creators of our reality and our paths are the paths we choose.

Victoria Reynolds Signature


Leave a comment

Getting Stoned

For me, getting stoned has a completely different frame of reference than it probably does for most people. It really has to do with being stoned. 

I almost never remember my dreams but this one stuck with me. I had a dream last night about a young giraffe. It had done something wrong and was standing in the dirt and tied to a tall Palm tree unable to move. A group of men were standing around it and throwing rocks at it to punish it for what it had done. In the dream I stood off to the side watching helplessly. I thought to myself, “That poor giraffe, I wonder how it feels not knowing why people are throwing rocks at it.” Then a voice in my head said, “You know exactly how it feels, remember.”

Then I woke up and realized that I was the giraffe. A memory from my childhood young_giraffe_on_white_background_600came flooding back. I recall I was around eleven years old. Some people called me a giraffe because of my long, thin neck. 

Click HERE for the rest of the story.

logo-signature

 

 

 


Leave a comment

From Bullied to Bodacious

As a child I was punished for being strong-willed, independent, daring and free-spirited. I was a precocious child who could see and think outside of the carefully crafted box my parents put me in.  My defiance against the system that used terror to control me made my father punish me all the more. Now, before I sound like a whiner, my well-meaning parents were simply over-protective and did the best they could with what they knew. They believed in a God that bullied them and unleashed His punishments if they failed to control me.

The continual pounding on my body, mind and heart finally broke my spirit and my will, just the way parents believed I needed to be.

I grew up with the archaic belief that, “a child’s will needs to be broken” and “you must come to God with a broken spirit.” By the time I reached my teens I felt sufficiently broken. What I didn’t know then that I know now, is that the extent of trauma I experienced at the hands of my peers, occurred because I had already been traumatized as a child.

In my research I’ve discovered that individuals with low self-esteem make easy targets for relentless bullies, and those who cannot develop resilience often end up in self-destructive behavior.

It took a very long time for me to put the pieces of myself back together, re-build my will and heal my broken spirit. It turns out they never really broke me, just damaged my ability to recognize my light myself. The spirit, just like the body, can be healed and restored. Now I’m back to my strong-willed, free-spirited, bold and audacious self.

For the rest of the story click HERE.

While you are there, don’t forget to sign up for your FREE Gift and see what else I’ve been up to lately. 

Victoria Reynolds Signature