The Polygamist's Daughter

Stories, Reflections and Conclusions of Life on the Inside


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Children of Cain, aka the Seed of Satan

The belief that people of African descent are of less value than God’s favored white people ran very deep in my childhood religiosity. It was believed that Blacks were the offspring of Satan through the lineage of Cain. That they were cursed with a dark color so that we would know to fear them and avoid them at all costs. To me this is one of the most hurtful and hateful beliefs ever propagated by religion. The belief that God despises some of Earth’s children so much that he holds them accountable for the actions of their ancestors thousands of years before their birth is mind-boggling. Talk about harboring resentments.

This was one of those beliefs that deeply affected my life for a very long time, really until just a few years ago. I had many dark skinned friends who I adored, yet still felt fear around them. Although I stopped logically believing this nonsense many years ago, my body did not get the message. While I truly enjoyed the company of my friends and their beautiful energy, I found it difficult to feel as connected with them as I was with my Caucasian friends, and this deep-seeded reservation really troubled my heart. To put it in easy to understand terms, I practically had an anxiety attack whenever I hugged one of my friends. It literally gave me heart palpitations, which I found very disturbing.

Once I understood where the root of my anxiety came from I was able to deal with it through forgiveness, compassion and love. After confronting the belief and working through it, I cleared any control it had over me and its remnants in my body. Freeing all of me up to genuinely love my friends, regardless of their physical appearance, and embrace them without reservation.

I am now able to see the ridiculousness in the belief that the shade of a person’s skin plays any role in their physical and spiritual worth. The rainbow does not judge one of its colors as better than another or the sun judge a ray of light as more valuable than the next, and yet we somehow have bought into the irrational belief that the Creator judges some of us as more worthy than others, simply because of our ancestry.

What makes this belief all the more irrational and inconceivable is information we now have about humanity and our collective evolution. Thanks to science we now know that all human life originated in Africa, which means we all had dark skin at one point in our ancestry. It really is amazing how one person’s story and perception spreads like a wildfire of destruction through the hearts of humanity, causing us to hold resentment toward other members of our human family. The belief that Black people are evil is only one story that shows evidence of how hurtful and unjustified our beliefs can be.


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What I Think about Polygamy Now

What do I really think about polygamy? Well that has changed over the years from thinking it was something God expected of me, to seeing it as a religious abuse and a human rights abuse against women and everything in between.

Having multiple sex partners and making lots of love sounds fabulous in theory, yet in reality I believe it is sadly missing the most crucial elements for genuine joy. It is important to understand that joy and happiness are two different things. Happiness is an emotion that can be generated in the belief that we are happy. It is generated by the perception of our choices and actions. Some people are perfectly happy in their misery, not realizing that joy is accessible. Joy is a state of being and occurs when we are fulfilled within ourselves and we no longer live our lives by the beliefs and expectations of anyone or anything else outside of ourselves. It is the result of our heart working to its full potential in alignment with our own inner truth.

Back to polygamy. Polygamy stems from a time in our human history when women were owned and collected by men and traded along with other livestock to build the kingdoms of men. King Solomon had hundreds of wives because he was a king with a very wealthy kingdom. Men gave him their daughters to earn favor with the king and in the hopes that their daughters would have a better life.

What does that have to do with today’s polygamy? Polygamy, now (except where polyamory is practiced – the newest hip term for open relationships, and a few ancient cultures where polyandry is practiced) only exists in cultures and belief systems where women are still recognized as being worth less than men and is justified by religion, otherwise recognized as religiously coerced polygyny. Some argue that it should be a person’s choice and yet any choice based in coercion, when there is a proverbial gun held at your head, isn’t really a free-will choice. It is a choice based in fear and is among the fear-based beliefs I often speak of.

Taking it a step further and assuming it is a choice based in freedom, there are still other issues to consider. It is nearly impossible to have a relationship that is balanced in the masculine and feminine when the numbers are lopsided. In a world where we are attempting to create balance and equality, polygamy simply does not make sense. The more women in the relationship the more masculine and authoritarian the man in the relationship is. That is why extremely authoritarian men are drawn to this form of relationship. The practice of polygyny also causes an imbalance among men. Men who are the most desirable attract the most women, leaving ordinary men without partners. Studies have shown that this imbalance increases violence in men and more hatred toward women. Precisely the opposite of the masculine/feminine balance and mutual respect so many of us are working to create.

And one more thought for consideration. Polygamy is heart breaking, or at the very least prevents the heart from working to its full potential. Women must guard their heart and cannot allow themselves to fully and completely love and connect with their husbands, simply because it hurts too much, and lovemaking lacks the creation of love. It also prevents men from opening up their heart and giving to their full ability out of the fear propagating jealousy and resentment between their wives. And yet, this is sold as love and beauty. What kind of love is it when we intentionally block our hearts from loving and creating to their greatest capacity?

In all honesty I don’t think polygamy can work until the world finally recognizes, once and for all, that men and women are equal. That if men can have more than one wife, women should be allowed the same courtesy, and that love can and should be given openly and freely without fear, coercion or jealousy.  It is certainly not my cup of tea, but in a perfect world it just might work. In a perfect world!


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For the past month or so I have been working on recreating my official website to make it more applicable to what I know is my life calling and global purpose.  That purpose is to teach others how to find their own truth and to liberate their minds, hearts and souls from the fear-based dogma found in many religions.  In understanding the difference between religiosity and spirituality we can then decipher the difference between fear and love, and the difference between belief and truth.

As we ask all of our religions to evolve to teach love rather than fear, we can then choose to follow our spiritual masters, if any, through love rather than fear.  While many of us have discovered that no middle-man is necessary to find our way home, there will always be those who need spiritual guidance and direction into their inner light and connection to all that is.

In order to be of a greater service I have created a community based website where members can come and express themselves on the subjects of spiritual evolution and transformation. I find that transformation occurs within open, loving and supportive communication.  Evolution occurs when we are open to recognizing what has been and determine how it can be changed for the betterment of ourselves and for the whole of humanity.

You are invited to join the community, create your own blog, start a discussion and promote your work, if it is in alignment with the work that I am doing.  Join the conversation and become part of the global movement that promotes freedom for the mind, heart and soul.

Visit www.VictoriaMReynolds.com and spread your word.